Announcing the Official Zev Winicur Monon Milestone Birthday Ride

I am so proud of myself. This past weekend, I biked 14 miles up and down the Monon Trail in Indianapolis. Yeah, sure, I know. A third of you are saying, "Only 14 miles? So, what? I eat 14 miles for breakfast." The other third are saying, "Are you NUTS? At YOUR age?" And then there's that third third who are saying, "Nice job! You go, dude! We are SO proud of you!"

The rest of this blog is for this last segment of the population. The rest of you can go eat your 14 mile breakfast someplace else.

Of course, I am feeling it. Oy, am I feeling it. My posterior is, shall we say, rather saddle sore. I was already feeling sore last Wednesday at Krav Maga class when our teachers, in an effort to train us how to do roll falls the correct way, took us outside to practice on the pavement. The good news is that my previous Aikido training from a decade ago kicked in, and my roll falls were flawless. The bad news is that I am nearing 40. Generally speaking, the untrained 40-year old body does not like to do roll falls on the pavement followed by 14 miles of torture to your tush on an uncomfortable bike seat.

Yes, you heard it right folks. I'm nearing the big 4-0, a.k.a. my second 39th birthday. August 13. Mark it on your Outlook calendars now.

About a month ago, some lovely ladies from my high school graduating class sent out an email informing all of their friends that they were celebrating turning 40 by participating in a 100 mile bike ride in California to raise money for some disease state or another...diabetes or breast cancer or coronary disease. I honestly can't remember. That's not the point. The point is that these ladies are meeting their midlife by pushing their bodies to the limit. They are embracing their age with a show of strength and endurance. They are telling the world that they are still fit, fetching, and fabulous. They are making me look really, really, really bad.

Even if I wanted to join them in California, there is no way I could whip my body back into shape for a 100 mile ride by August 13. Sure, I've lost 15 lbs. in the past three months. Sure, I've built up some muscle by going to Krav Maga twice a week. Sure, I regularly exercise my stomach muscles by lying on the floor and letting my children jump on me. But 100 miles? Nobody eats 100 miles for breakfast.

I figure that the best I can do is 30 miles. That's twice the length of the Monon Trail in Indianapolis and Carmel. I think that with some practice runs and a more comfortable bike seat, I can easily tackle the Monon. In fact, I'm setting Saturday, August 16, as the official day for the official Zev Winicur Monon Milestone Birthday Ride.

You are all invited to join me, of course. In fact, I would love the company. Nothing provides incentive for a massive physical endeavor than someone else alongside you preventing you from wussing out. I plan to start at the Frank and Judy O'Bannon Old Northside Soccer Park at 9:00am at 16th Street and Lewis Street, bike south for 0.25 miles to the start of the Monon Trail, bike north for 15 miles until we hit 146th Street, bike back down south to our waiting vehicles, and then drink two entire canteens of water. If you come, bring your own water and sunblock. And bike. And cushy bikeseat.

Afterwards, we can all go out for beer at some nice local establishment, such as the Broad Ripple Brewpub. The first round is on me, but only if you all agree to order a GOOD beer. I'm not about to pay for your Bud or Miller Lite. I'm not going to have you embarrassing me. This is serious business, and life is way too short to drink that swill. Besides, let's face it...I'm not getting any younger.

My apologies

My mother was very surprised to see the picture on my last blog entry. She is waiting for me to post enough articles to send the image downward.

My wife, on the other hand, had no problem with the picture. Rather, she chastised me for the many punctuation errors that appeared in my blog entries. She realizes that I tend to write late at night (when I am at my sleepiest), and she has begged me to have her proofread my articles before I publish them. I am not sure just how that will work. "Shirah. Shirah. Shirah, wake up. I need you to proofread my diatribe against Bush's tax policy." Yeah, like that's going to happen.

Since I have offended both my mother and my wife, It is likely that I have offended many of you as well, either with my imagery or with my grammar. I apologize profusely. In the future, I vow to pay better attention to my apostrophes. And I'll try to limit the pictures of scantily clad women to one or two per month.

Its the least I can do.

Um...I mean it's the least I can do.

Succubus On Top

Now that I'm a successful professional in the continuing medical education industry, I feel that I need to convey a sense of professionalism both in the office and on the road. So, on my flight home from the MedBiquitous conference last weekend (an organization that promotes technical standards for medical education), I should have been reading the latest issue of the Journal of Continuing Education in the Health Professions or perhaps some photocopyied journal articles about clinical guidelines for antiplatelet therapy. You know, something that would have said, "Wow! That man is truly a professional. I'll sit next to him so that some of his professionalism will rub off on me."

Instead, I was burning my way through a paperback sporting the less than family-oriented image pictured above. I was doing my best to hide the cover on my lap so that parents wouldn't pull their children away from me. Unfortunately, my perpetual smile and constant snickering probably wasn't doing anything to label me as "sane" or "safe."

This is what happens when you read Richelle Mead's books. They are definitely for those of us who felt a deep void in our lives when the show Buffy the Vampire Slayer went off the air.

Succubus Blues and the sequel Succubus on Top are urban fantasy novels that tell the story of Georgina Kincaid, a succubus living in modern society. At night she goes out tempting men into sexual relations so that she can suck some of their life force out of them and send them on the road to eternal damnation. During the day she works at a local bookstore and organizes the booksignings. Naturally, her profession as a succubus messes with her desire to have anything resembling a normal life. She wants to develop a long term relationship with one of her favorite authors, but this is complicated by the need for absolute celibacy...you know, so she doesn't drain away his life force. Wacky highjinks ensue.

The books are wildly entertaining. They are not what I would call high literature, but Mead is very good at creating quirky characters, snappy dialog, and interesting explorations of religious and fantasy mythology. One of my favorite characters is her boss, Jerome, a demon who's immense power is balanced by his strange decision to take on the appearance of John Cusack. You get the idea.

The third book in the series, Succubus Dreams, is coming out in October. With any luck, it will coincide with another conference. I can already feel the airline passengers edging away from me.

Happy Birthday Israel!

A belated Happy Birthday to the State of Israel. 60 years old. Amazing. So young!

May you live to 120...and beyond.

Does Hillary Truly Support Israel?

Here's an interesting conundrum. The United Methodist Church has for the last couple of months been debating a resolution calling for divestment from any company that does business with Israel, such as Caterpillar, the tractor manufacturer, "because the company supplies Israel with bulldozers used in building the separation barrier and in demolishing Palestinian homes. The divestment resolution comes only months after the publication of a church-sponsored report referring to the creation of the State of Israel as the 'original sin.'"

As of today, the United Methodist Church rejected five proposed resolutions urging divestment from companies doing business with Israel. This seems to be largely due to many Jewish groups who worked feverishly with the Methodist Church to convince them to defeat the resolutions.

In this "guilt by association" atmosphere, shouldn't Hillary Clinton have been questioned about her supposed support for Israel? She is a lifelong Methodist, yet I don't remember hearing her speak out against the church resolution. Obama was literally raked across the coals for his relationship with Jeremiah Wright, yet Hillary is being given a free pass. Surely, one could/should argue that if she has been associated with the church for most of her life, it suggests that she supports the church doctrine.

It's not that I believe that Hillary is at all anti-Israel, but NEITHER IS OBAMA. It's a simple matter of double standards. Either you judge the candidates on their associates or you judge them on their own merit, actions, and words. But you judge them both EQUALLY.

Besides, if we're talking about guilt by association, we can have a field day with McCain and John Hagee.